Testimonies
Mr. Oxton first met Shawn Parker in 1996, when Parker was a much younger man struggling with issues of parenthood with the mother of his daughter and son. “Over the years,” Mr. Oxton said, “I became a mentor to Shawn, and it has been a distinct honor to be thought of in those terms.” The relationship that began with legal representation evolved into a continuing friendship, and it was the guidance that Mr. Oxton provided that inspired Parker to start the Engaging in Molding Choices program.
“I grew up in a dysfunctional family,” Parker explained. “I never laid eyes on my father.”
Although he always worked hard, since the age of 9, Parker related that he didn’t have even a “basic understanding of how to function professionally.” Some of the kids he grew up with in Lompoc began getting into destructive behaviors and while Parker himself never went down that road, he was also never exposed to the behaviors and mindset of successful and effective people.
“Mr. Oxton changed my thinking,” Parker relates. The experience of working with Mr. Oxton gave Parker a new approach to handling his financial and personal affairs, and the realization of how much he had not known previously—in addition to the realization that a lot of youth grow up in similar circumstances, lacking guidance in basic financial understanding—motivated Parker to start EMC. “It’s because of whence he came,” Mr. Oxton said of Parker’s background, “he’s had to learn life’s tools on the fly.” But Parker is a quick study, and Mr. Oxton noted that he has a “great deal of compassion and empathy—he’s learned a lot over the years, and grown a lot.” And when considering the potential impact of the Engaging in Molding Choices program, Mr. Oxton points out that he “can’t think of many people better positioned than Shawn to help young people.”
Indeed, Parker has come a long way, and he has the unique perspective of recognizing the challenges he has had to face and overcome. He also sees how difficult it can be for youth when they don’t grow up with parents and family who demonstrate the skills and practices for success in work and personal finance. “Mr. Oxton told me that it was ‘expected’ that his kids would go to college. It wasn’t that way in my household growing up,” Parker said. Indeed, Parker knows firsthand what it is to break from the limitations of one’s upbringing. “The world put us in this position,” Parker said. “This program [EMC] is bringing it back so we can all communicate and have the same opportunities… with these skills anyone can better themselves, better their situation.”
Sahara Castro
What EMC Means To Me
EMC has helped me a lot when it comes to skills. For example, time management has always been a weak point for me, mostly because I so often dissociate. I have been working very hard to stay focused and be aware of my surroundings. Although throughout these weeks I have fallen multiple times, EMC has been there to pick me up. Whether it was advice or life coaching, I have listened and absorbed it all.
When I first joined EMC I had known most, if not all, of the skills that were talked about in class. Unfortunately I was not utilizing them in my life, that’s where Shawn stepped in. He made examples of how you can use the skills in real life situations. I felt as if I could relate more that way so I was really dialed in. Being optimistic is another skill that stood out to me because of my depression. Sadly snapping out of depression is not a thing, but being optimistic about situations life throws at you is. The finance unit was my favorite because we don’t learn about any of that our senior year. I feel like EMC gave me a jumpstart in life because so many of my friends are unaware of what is happening around them.
Throughout these weeks I have been working on my mind, confidence, future goals, short term planning and more. Financially EMC reduced so much stress from my life, from helping me with personal products to everyday transportation such as bus passes, I am thankful. EMC welcomed me with open arms and taught me so much to prepare me for this world, I am very excited for others to experience this program.
Raymond Ortega
Entering the EMC program I was excited to learn important life skills that I needed to know in order to properly function in a future career I would choose. The career that I want is to be a movie director. I have always wanted to make movies for as long as I can remember but I was always unsure about how I would ever become a movie director. The opportunity I had to go to the film festival back in February was a great experience for me. Shawn introduced me to a couple upcoming filmmakers and actors and all of them gave me good advice. At certain times I would doubt that I would ever become a successful filmmaker. One that is an expert like Martin Scorsese, Stanley Kubrick, Orson Welles, Alfred Hitchcock or Steven Spielberg.
The main reason why I would always doubt myself is because there are no proper steps to becoming a successful film director. There are no film schools that can guarantee that you will direct a movie that will be in theaters nationwide once you graduate. But in order to get there I need to be an optimist and always look at the bright side of situations even if there is pure darkness.
Being emotionally intelligent is equally as important as being academically intelligent and in order to apply what you learn from school into the real world you must have emotional intelligence. And the EMC program taught me how to be more emotionally intelligent. I think this program will benefit kids who want to be successful in the future. Whether you have dreams of being a mechanic, doctor, reality tv star, engineer, singer or private investigator the EMC program will put you on the right track. It is important to have these skills being taught to the youth before they graduate high school so that it gives them a heads up on what they will face in the real world and how they can handle those challenges. A few examples of some of the skills are having an open mind, Being able to receive compliments and criticism, Being respectful, and giving your 100%. Each class was enjoyable and interesting because I would learn something new every time. My experience with EMC has taught me how to manage money and important life skills, prepared me for my driver’s permit, given me a California id and a bank account, and has given me the opportunity to interact with aspiring filmmakers.
I want to thank all the sponsors and also Shawn Parker for creating the EMC program.
Abbie Hill
EMC is the most helpful program that I have joined. EMC (Engaging in Modeling Choices) walks you through what you are going to need to know when you become independent. Shawn Parker, my EMC teacher, is all joy and positivity-I appreciate that about him. I feel that ever since we have started this program, our social skills have shot through the roof and so have our bank accounts! It definitly feels good to have money in the bank all of the time and not have to stress about being in debt. I love how we are never put down. If we ask for help, we receive it and have a full understanding at the end.
Some of our main topics that we discuss are: Time Management, Social Skills, Budgeting, Listening, Focus, Open Mindedness, Critical thinking, Self Care, and How to deal with Stress (one of my favorites. All of these are very important for teens to understand at a young age. These skills help build character and a strong mindset for your future. This program has helped me pull myself out of the dirt and get my life back together. I now have a great job working at Trader Joes thanks to the program and Shawn Parker . I have learned to always be 15-20 minutes early for work so that I can feel Trader Joe’s atmosphere for the day and settle into a working mindset. Shawn has taught me how to deal with time management. For example, I am never late to school anymore. This program taught me to use a calendar and planner to plan out short-term goals every two weeks. I am more focused and know I am accomplishing my set goals.
I remember when I first started EMC, Shawn and I were talking doing a one-on-one session and the first thing he asked me was “How are you doing? What is something we can help you out with?” You have no idea how good it felt when he reached out to me. I had been struggling trying to support my two year old son and myself as a teenager with no support from my family. No one was there for me and the only one who has been there for my son is myself. I told Shawn that I was struggling to get food and a babysitter. He and his wife took time out of their lives to take me grocery shopping. I was being taken care of by two amazing people I hardly knew. I’ve never had motivation from anyone, my family kept telling me I’m going to be a “basic teen mom and live off of the government and not graduate high school.” I would hear that so much that I started believing them and getting frustrated with myself. Why would I bring my son into a world where we would be struggling everyday? Living on the low end, not knowing what we are going to do next? I would cry every night for my mom and dad, but they did not care and all they saw was that their daughter had done something so evil that it was going to affect the whole family.
From the first day of EMC, my son, Bentley, and I got the skills we needed to survive in life. I was not going to stress anymore because I learned how to handle my stress and identify why I was stressing. Shawn would always tell me “You’re stressing because you keep procrastinating, which was very true. So I listened to him and began to get on top of my work.
I respect Shawn Parker. When he says he is going to do something, he will get it done. “What goes around, comes around” is something I always hear him say, He’s got a lot of good things coming to him in his future. “Open mindedness helps critical thinking”, this statement is very true. It is very important to be open minded to opportunities and people that will help you get access to a great amount of support. Short term and long term goals are needed to have an open, healthy mindset in life to plan out your ideal future. I no longer feel like a hopeless, single mom. This program has helped me to feel great about my life and proud to be a mom. I am positive and have learned that it’s easier to keep a positive mindset than a negative one. Shawn reminds me to not let little things bother me. Without this class, I don’t think I’d be as strong as I am today.
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